On Being a Grandparent

I'm re-discovering the joy of watching a toddler discover the world. I remember the fun of watching my children as toddlers, but I was probably so busy with the necessities of daily life that I often took only a moments notice. The big smile - "I'm so proud of myself!"

Just now, Marbel did some quick squats, hanging onto the arm of my chair. Up-down-up-down-up - then she looked at me and a big smile broke out. "Aren't I amazing." Earlier, riding her rocking horse one-handed: rock, rock, rock - stand up - rock, rock, rock, standup. Big smile! I'm sure these weren't the first times, but the wonder of learning what legs can do is an amazing thing to watch.

Why does it seem so much more fun to see as a grandparent? Is it just that I have more time to breathe and watch, since I'm not constantly juggling working with the million things a parent has to do to raise children? Probably in part. Is it because I haven't really noticed in a long time and it seems new again? I think it is more than just reflections upon fading memories. I've helped raise five grandchildren, and I remember noticing these things more than with my own children. That's sad in a way, but it makes being a grandfather even more wonderful. But why is watching Maribel even more amazing that watching my other grandchildren as toddlers? I think that age brings more capacity to reflect on the wonders of life. Maybe, on the way to growing up, I lost more of that ability than others, so regaining it is more profound. But mostly I think there is a cycle of wonder as a child, that comes back around when you get older.

Maybe it's just that I turned 55 this month and I'm feeling very reflective.

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